A New Year...A New Word

Ok, so I have to confess, I've never really liked New Year's resolutions. They sort of rub me the wrong way. They just don't quite fit for me. I think it's because resolutions feel a bit confining. And they have a twinge of feeling like rules. With a sliver (or maybe a tad more) ;) of a rebellious streak in me, creating a rule for myself often makes me want to break it...or have a bad attitude while carrying it out! A little odd since I'm such a rule follower if put in place by someone else! (I'm sure there's some deep psychological meaning to all of that but that's not the point, now, is it?!).

So a few years ago, in lieu of resolutions, I decided I'd come up with a word for the year instead. (I found out later that lots of people do this!) I begin praying around Christmas each year that God would bring to mind my "word of the year". It has been amazing to see how those years have lived up to their word.

The first year it was faithfulness. That year I really focused on and enjoyed the fruit of being faithful in spending time with the Lord as well as being faithful in the little things of life. The following year He brought to mind one that wasn't so fun...repentance. Blech! Yet that year truly was one of changing the course and turning from some sinful patterns that were too big in my life. The next was anticipation. Little did I know at the time this would be the year I'd become pregnant with Little Miss and spend much of that year excitedly anticipating her arrival. And then there was last year. Peace...seek it, pursue it and sit in it no matter the cost. Once again God knew what I'd need to set my sights on in 2009. That peace was often threatened by the circumstances of life...Drew's health issues, Andy's job search and my dad's impending transplant. But as I reflect back on the year I really do see how He brought much peace in the midst of it all. It did not come easy at times. Often I had to fight for it more than I wanted to and on occasion I didn't fight for it at all. Yet in His grace he afforded it to me anyway.

And now here we are on the first day of 2010 and it's time for a new word! I've been pondering it the past couple of weeks and had a few different ones bouncing around in my head yet one keeps pushing it's way to the forefront more than the others. I've found myself saying, "Lord, this can't be the word you want for me!". Some of the competitors have been discipline, focus and hard work. But do you know what the word is?!? It's ENJOY!!!

I need to work on enjoying! Now, that's a word I like! Yet, believe it or not, it's a challenge for me. I can get in such a rut of keeping my "nose to the grindstone" or working hard or finding ways to better myself or things in my home that need improving or learning new parenting skills or 10 steps to being the perfect wife that I often forget just to enjoy. So, this year I want to do something each day that is for pure enjoyment...as simple as watching a tv show or taking a long bath or flipping through a magazine. And on a bigger scale I want to enjoy life more, enjoy the people I love, try new things (like this blog!)and actually take the time to think about what it is that brings me joy. Somehow I often think that God values hard work more than enjoyment. But I think I've missed the mark on this one. Nothing thrills my heart more than watching my kids laugh and play their little hearts out! God has given us many things simply for our enjoyment and I can't help but think that his heart must feel much like mine when He sees me doing just that.